In search of.......

Just another Monday ya’ll

Well, if you all have been following the S.I.L. chronicles, I haven’t heard anything from that heffa since I e-mailed her my last e-mail (which I don’t think I posted), in which I IGNORED her dumb-ass reference to the fact that we could “save more” by just coming to Atlanta and could still afford to give her a little money…….”. Whatever bitch….. I am done. Nothing to see folks move it along……

O.K......So.....I have been a bad mommy. By that I mean, I hemmed and hawwed and WAITED Until the LAST FREAKIN moment to get my son’s Halloween outfit! Soooooooooooooooo…… I knew I had to go out this weekend. So, because my husband bowls every other weekend and I didn’t want to WAIT until he was done bowling to get up and get out after I got my nails done, I kept “the boy” with me and at about 11:30 we got up and began our journey. I needed him to be there so that I could make SURE that the outfit fit him because ya’ll KNOW how FUNKY those places are ; “no returns” is their motto.

But why ya’ll, whyyyyyyyyy didn’t I just go on and wait until AFTER he had had his daily NAP???????????? Can you say that I had a long and FRUSTRATING afternoon????? Let’s start with the fact that he was CROTCHETY all to hell and wanted EVERYTHING his hands touched or his eyes came in contact with and every NO response from me, caused him to start CRYING AND HOLLERIN’. Now, I am NOT one of those parents that will scurry out of the locale that I am in JUST because I have a kid crying! NO! You need to LEARN that you will NOT get your way and that you WILL get knocked the FUCK OUT (a la Chris Tucker) if you do notSHUT. IT. UP. ! There is NOTHING that I can’t stand MORE than a screaming/ crying/hollerin child. And he is usually not like THAT. If he does cry I can get him to "shut it up" MUUUUCH easier than on this here day!! So we had to have the “do you want me to POP you?”conversation a MULTITUDE of times on that there day! I also knew he had not had his nap , so I wasn’t trying to kill his lil booty because I knew there was a direct cause and effect.

Well, lucky for him that he was just crying (albeit LOUDLY) and the fact that he was not throwing a straight UP tantrum, saved him from getting his ass TORE out the frame.

So, we go out and it had to be THEE RAINIEST, WINDIEST freakin day that I have been out in in a WHILE! Of course, I am trying to use an umbrella while holding my son (which is USUALLY not a problem), and that bitch flipped over TWICE and rain is FUCKING UP MY HAIR so I was TRIPLE mad (you all KNOW black women don’t play with their DAYUM hair at least if you have a permed/curled style!) and rain is hitting me AND him in the face so hard I could barely SEE, and I can’t get the FUCKIN umbrella to turn BACK the right way. He’s crying, I am getting ridiculously pissed off……

This was NOT a good time. AT. ALL.

We then go to not one but THREE different places to try to find THIS EXACT ELMO outfit. Not this one and not this one. I don’t like the last two AT.DAMN.ALL!!! They look like something I could make at my house!! So…..I wanted him to have the first one! Well, after fucking with the dayum WIND AND RAIN and his CRYING DAYUM NEAR INCESSANTLY about EVERY.THING, I was ready to say “ you know what….. I know it’s my fault, but you just won’t be GOING to a Halloween party cause I can’t FIND the dayum outfit!”

And my theory is, if I can’t find what I LIKE, I just won’t get SHIT. So, then I felt bad and went to ONE more place where I found it. Now….thanks to my procrastination, the outfit that my husband had seen for $29.99, I had seen online for $39.99, cost MY ASS 49.99!!!!!! Do YOU HEAR ME???????? I just had to get it though and BEFORE YA’LL START DOGGIN ME………. I will do JUST WHAT I have seen others do next year…..SELL IT ON EBAY !!!! Please believe it! So though I CRINGED at the price, he looks soooooo cute in it. We had been invited to this little girl’s party who he used to go to his old daycare with and it was ON SATURDAY, so I am so glad he was able to go, cause I sho’ll wasn’t talking him in his “STREET CLOTHES”. Me, my husband and and my son went to the party and had a ball!!! The little girls’s mom had decorated her basement, had hotdogs, chips, coney dogs with the condiments and Halloween decorated cupcakes and ice cream. She also made each guest VERY NICE AND FULL Halloween bags and had games for them to play like Pin the Tail on the Cat, the Dart game that's played with the Velcro balls instead of darts, “who can eat the donut off the string the fastest” , and a blindfold game where you have 30 seconds to dig in to a bowl of rice and pull out as much as you can. It was a lot of fun. There were only 5 kids there, but it was really quaint and fun. That lil boy got over like a FAT-RAT too because he had more JUNK food that night than he probably had ALL WEEK!! LOL I took pictures, and will post them with the pictures from the party that we will be going to tomorrow.

So, though Saturday was not the LEAST bit enjoyable being out with a SEVERELY irritable, crotchety two year old in the DAMN 50mph wind and rain (yes, the wind was REALLY that high), all’s well that ends well and my lil one even won first prize for his costume at the Halloween Party, so it was all worth it!

Be e-z ya’ll…….