Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Slap your irritating co-worker day!

Hey ya’ll this is an oldie but goodie. I meant to post about my baby and his potty adventures, but I'll wait until tommorrow for that :)

Anyway, here's an oldie but goodie for you guys to laugh at!



Tomorrow is the official “Slap Your Irritating Co-Worker “ Holiday: Do you have a co-worker who talks nonstop about nothing, working your last nerve with tedious and boring details that you don’t give a rat’s ass about? (yup….my dumb-ass boss is constantly telling me and others who gives a damn LESS about her aging momma, her dead dog, her new house, her buying a bedspread, her siblings all of whom have MULTIPLE things physically wrong with them, etc……O.K. CHECK!) Do you have a co-worker who ALLLLWAYS fucks something up , thereby creating MORE work for your ass ( my boss creates DUMB ass spreadsheets for everything…sometimes redundant mind you and then will wanna change something in it and FUCK UP formulas and SWEAR she gave it to YOU correct and that YOU fucked it up……O.K., CHECK!)??? Do you have a co-worker who kisses so much ass; you can look in their mouth and see what their BOSS ate for lunch (I swear, if I had a dime for every time I saw my boss smiling her shit-eatin grin at the president ….i’d be a rich ass**smdh**…O.K. , CHECK!)? Do you have a co-worker who is SOOOOO obnoxious, when he/she enters a room, everyone else clears it (I swear, if there is a social event, which are few and far between these days because of the saving initiative that’s been going on for the last 2 years, but when there IS a potluck or something, when THAT hoe starts talking and you aren’t OBLIGATED to stay people fake it like they need to go say hi to bobby jo in the corner over there……people get away from this bitch as quickly as possible…..for real ya’ll……..O.K. CHECK!?) Well, on behalf of Ike Turner, I am so very proud and extremely happy to announce tomorrow as

SLAP YOUR IRRITATING CO-WORKER DAY !!!

There are some rules you must follow:
• you can only slap one person per hour
• you can slap the same person again if they irritate you again in the asme day.
• You are allowed to hold someone down as other co-worker’s take turns slapping the irritant.
• No weapons allowed… other than going upside somebody’s head with a stapler, hole puncher or if you must (to get your point across) the paper slicer. Just hit em….don’t slice em.
• If questioned by a supervisor (or the police if the supervisor is the irritant), you are allowed to LIE, LIE, LIE !!!!

Now, study the rules, break out your list of folks that could benefit from this intervention that you wanna slap the hog-shit out of and get to slappin’…… and have a great day!

Friday, March 24, 2006

Cover thine own asses!

This is save ya OWN Ass Friday!

In the ever continuing corporate bit-o bullshit saga… (dayum, I'm FOREVER having something to complain about when it comes to this job! * sigh *)

Check this out….. This morning, I got an e-mail from a manager at our company saying that he was ready to make a job offer to “this guy”. However, “this guy” had some issues that may prevent him from being hired. Boss-Bitch (I like that phrase) says “Robyn, you need to tell “Manager 1” (who “this guy” would be working for) that I DO NOT agree with this decision to hire him because of __issue#2___. He will need to document the fact that he’s been advised of this in the event that “this guy” messes up. He needs to know that I don not agree with his choice and that it is his choice to hire “this guy”.

Me: O.K. I’ll let him know.

Now he had sent me the message below after Boss-bitch told me to let “Manager 1” know the info. above. And I consequently responded to it, telling him what Boss-Bitch said. I cc’ed Boss Bitch on this e-mail so she could see that I did what she asked me to do. She come’s FLYING wit' her wig all twisted, over to me like 15 minutes later (I’m assuming as soon as she saw the e-mail) bothered by the fact that I told “Manager 1”

EXACTLY. WHAT. THAT. BITCH.SAID

Please see the communication below for details:


From: Manager 1 [ Manager1@stankassco.com
Sent: Friday, March 24, 2006 10:42 AM
To: Robyn __________
Subject: “This Guy” Offer


Robyn,
I've talked with “this guy”. I would ask that the offer be for a base
salary of $XX,XXX.00, plus his 10% at risk. He can start as early as
Monday, _________ - so it's just an issue of when we can get the offer to him.

My thanks, Manager 1.

-----Reply Message-----

Hi Manager 1,

Thanks for the quick return. Just to let you know that "Boss Bitch" advised me that she wants it to be said that she does not agree with choosing him due to his issue#2 with the _____. I did show her the e-mail's that he sent to you and that you forwarded to me regarding his __issue #2__and ___issue#1___. "Boss Bitch" indicated that there was not a problem with the ___issue#1___as this would not be a criteria used to disqualify someone, however, due to the fact that this individual has fiduciary responsibilities as a ___________, she is not in agreement with this choice based on the lack of financial responsibility evidenced by the ___issue#2____.

She further indicated that you will need to write a memo to file regarding your decision to hire this individual, stating that you are aware of the past problems he has had regarding his finances and that you are comfortable with hiring him.

Call me with any questions.

Thanks,
Robyn


So, this bitch is pissed and I’m like ‘WHAT?!!!’ Why in the FUCK are you pissed that I told him exactly what YOUR ass said. She goes “ well, It comes off like I am trying to be Queen Bee (yes, ya’ll…this white woman who has NO knowledge of black shit said it) and I just wanted you to tell him that there may be some issues……….” It was at THAT point that I tuned her out and mumbled an “oh, sorry….. I didn’t want Manager 1 to think that it was MY doing, since I do not have that power, THEREFORE, I DID want to make it clear that it came from you and I told him that you didn’t agree with it….. (thinking, what’s the damn problem BITCH?) If I do what you say, I fuck up,if I DON’T do what you say I am now doing things as you “DIRECTED ME” to do (and yes, she has NO problem coming at me with those exact words). So, I win when I lose and vice versa. It’s always a fuckin no win situation with this stank ass hoe.

I’m goin on Monster right now…..naw, for real this time ya’ll…… it’s always something with her funky micromanaging ass. But guess what…….? I COVERED MY OWN ASS on this one! Cause "Manager 1" woulda come at ME all funky if it hadn’t have been clear that this was not me trying to be Billy-Bad-Ass and make decisions not within my realm of authority (because Boss Bitch gives NO ONE authority, she must have it all), and I was gon’ make DAMN sho he knew it was HER wishes, not mine. Naw... BITCH! You ain't EVEN gon put this on me because you DO run around here and act like "Queen Bee".....it ain't no damn secret! People pretty much know she's a shitty individual 98.9 percent of the time, the other 1.1% she's trying to be a fake ass and ACT like she "really cares about your well being".

Whatever dude. If you got the balls bitch then OWN UP TO THEM MUGS!!!! You said what you wanted me to tell him, it's not MY job to infer or soften shit. Cause if I did, then you'd have ANUTHA problem that I didn't do "what I directed you to do". NOPE! Your own shittiness got'cha bitch! LOL

It's these small, shitty victories that count ya'll....small shitty victories :-) hee hee!

Moral of the story: Don’t tell me to do something hoe if you don’t want me to do it.

Have a good weekend ya’ll !!!!

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Today’s bit’o corporate bullshit….

Hello kiddies! Well, I’m back for another exciting
rant on

“TODAY’S BIT’O CORPORATE BULLLLLLLLLLLLLSHIT”

Well, today’s bit’o bull comes from a co-worker of
mine and this is a good one. This woman (a black
woman) told me that this young, attractive white boy
who works for OUR company was recently told that he
was FORBIDDEN to go to lunch with a white girl
who works for the client that we service. WTF???? My first question is why? Did they have any ties professionally ? Did she report to him or vice versa? What caused this mandate?

Before my corporate police readers
come down on me, let me say this: This white boy is
married, is about 24, attractive, etc., and has NO
dealings with this white girl (who doesn’t even reside
on our floor in this building)
professionally. They
have no juris diction over each other, do not report, do not take
orders from nor, AGAIN, do they have ANY professional ties to
each other. So what’s the problem, right?


Well, the big bad “Director of all things we must suck
ass because the CLIENT said so” dictated it. This would be the boy’s director (I say boy because he looks like he’s about 15!).

Apparently the “perception” was that there might have have been some
impropriety going on betwixt them and he is married
(she is unmarried) and that since the “perception”
(there’s that funky ass word again) was that “people”
were talking about them having LUNCH together so often, and
because the CLIENT said
so…..it must stop

*shaking my head thinking that
I’d probably be fired if that shit had been DEMANDED
of me*


You all have noooooooooooooooooooooo right or dominion
over WHO IN THE FUCK I EAT LUNCH WITH!!!! There is no
“business reason” other than some shitty
ass/half-baked ass “perception” that the two of them
“might be “ fuckin’. And there IS NO conflict of interest just because she works for the client, so that ain't it. And if so, AGAIN….is it the business of my company or hers???? NO ! That is THEIR issue and THEIR problem! I SWEAR white folks get so into what is “perceived” and what they think and in people’s business SO TOUGH, that it just drives me INSANE!

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHAT if they are fucking?!!!! Ain’t that HIS
business and HER business????!! I heard tell that the
girl was very upset when this mandate came down last
week. Now this boy (he really looks like he’s about
15…..for real) works in a sensitive area where MUCH
confidential info. COULD be disseminated if he so
chose. So, maybe that’s why they were all up in arms,
huh?

FUCK THAT! If you all can’t PROVE that I have leaked
company secrets, then get the fuck off my back!
I get
an UNPAID 1 hour lunch and I should be able to eat
with WHOMEVER I see fit! FUCK THAT!


Personal Interjection:
Now, for those that don’t know me, this is a sensitive
subject with me because my bitch-ass boss at one point
stopped me & my girl from eating together but her real
reason (see: I’m jealous because you two are close
and have secrets that you DON’T tell me and I’m acting
like a 5-year old who you won’t play with….no for
real….. that was the ONLY reason….. because she wanted
to be “in” our little group and we refused to let the
bitch in….so she got spiteful)
was thinly veiled
within the mighty “BUSINESS NECESITY” line. She had
told us (because we work in the SAME group, that she
“needed to have someone (other than the guy that does
labor because he knows NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hr/benefits
stuff…..I mean NONE) here who can help with benefits
in case I am pulled into a meeting,etc. so you two
need to stagger your lunches” Well, there wasn’t much
we could do to fight that shyt because this bitch is a
MASTER lie-weaver/hide-shit-in-a-corporate-business-reason
mufucka. And if we hadda made a stink about it (i.e.
go to the president because that’s the ONLY place we
can take shit because this hoe IS THE HR VP……he’d have
submitted to her in an “well-that-makes-sense-we-have-to-be-customer-service-oriented” bullshit way, because he’s REDICULOUS when it comes to “the client is always right” type shit…..his ass
shoulda worked for Burger King because when it comes
to the client NOTHING is questioned and they can
basically “have it your way” with us….. I hate that
shit too…which is why unless I was ready to get fired
I would NEVER take ANYTHING to the president……he’s too
unaware/don’t care when it comes to recognizing her
evil ways)



But the real is that this boy was promised a job BEFORE he even graduated college and he had not had ANY (did ya’ll hear me) ANNNNNNNY experience doing what the job required. They liked him though, and that was alls he wrote. He has since got 2 SIGNIFICANT raises in the 2 years that he has been here (outside of the normal “pay raise” time period, mind you….) because he was “learning so well and could be considered to be the same level now as the other two guys he works woth”.


What – the – fuck – ever……. Sell stupid somewhere else, I’m all stocked up. The truth is, that because he’s a white male, he has received truly unjustified (wait….does “because I want to give it to him qualify as justifiable???? Just asking) raises!! Like I said, I really feel that I do NOT need to be in HR because seeing all of this UNFAIR ASS SHIT makes me madder than HELL !!! Had I not seen all that I have seen (especially monetary-wise) I probably wouldn’t have the “life ain;t fair and white folks get over WAAAAY more than blacks thanks to the good ole boys & girls network” attitude. But I do….. Cause I know what I know and I’ve seen what I’ve seen.

But ole boy COULDN’T rock the boat and say shit in opposition to this mandate because he has GOT TA know that he is making az DAYUM good salary for the (lack of) years of experience he has and his new little wifey be done KILT (yes, I did say it) his ass if he comes home talking about I got fired because I stood up to the powers that be because I couldn’t have lunch with my trinket at work…… PUH LEASE ! He ain’t stupid……There is NO Way without a whooooooooooooole lot of looking and patience could he probably #1 find the type of job that he has (because his job is very different and weird) nor could he command this SAME salary elsewhere. He’s only got TWO freakin years into this field and ANYWHERE else would NOT want to pay his ass, so he PROMPTLY shut the fuck up and went on and dealt with that blow. They probably are fuckin or at least enjoy flirtin……nah…..they fuckin! LOL

Anyway, the end all and be all is that I’dda blown up that SPOT cause I work in HR, and there are enough HR jobs out there that they’da HAD to give me a justifiable JOB RELATED reason why I couldn’t have LUNCH with someone.

Eat or Die ya’ll…….
r.

Friday, March 17, 2006

Black. White.

O.K., I have been wanting to post about this new DUMB ASS show Black.White. that is on FX. Lawd, ya’ll…. I watched this show and wanted to jump through the screen at these folks.

This was my first time watching it, as I missed the opening show last week. Well, if you haven’t heard of it, this is a reality-t.v. show where one black family (mother, father and son) get make-up put on their entire body so that they appear white and a white family (mother, father, daughter) get made up to look black.

FIRST CRITICISM: If is almost IMPOSSIBLE to make a black person with strong features (see: big ass nose and big lips) look like anything other than a pasty albino looking mufucka and that is EXACTLY what the black woman made up to look white, looks like! She LOOKS like a black woman in white face!!! Take a look at her ass!!!



Come on, and the son and the father ain’t no better! You just cannot make black people with strong features look WHITE! They look like they crawled out of a damn can of pasty-ass Poppin Fresh Biscuits. PUH-LEASE.

Now, the white people look a wee bit more believable as a whole, but that Momma…..she looks a hot-fire-shit mess.




That afro on her ass is ridiculous but she could still pass for black. The father looks a bit suspect to me, but maybe that’s because I am black and if I were to see him I’d look at his ass like “something ain’t right about his ass……” but might now be able to put my finger on it. But that white GIRL. Baaay-bee……. She looks JUST LIKE A BLACK GIRL when they make her up! Do you hear me???? I was watching the show thinking, DAMN!! If I saw her ass in the street I would have noooooooooo idea that she was NOT black!!! Hell I ain’t the only one because she was enrolled in this all-black poetry class and not NARRY a one of them black girls OR boys knew she was white until she told them. I’ll discuss that later……But anyway, because blacks as a whole are mixed with SO many other races, it is NOT uncommon to find a black woman or man with keen features. So , as a whole the White-to-Black transformation was mush more believable.

But let’s get to the meat of my beef with this shit. Why did black momma take the white momma out to buy some “afrocentric” clothes and this white woman (dressed as a black at the time mind you) goes towards the “Dashiki’s” and decides that THAT is what she wants to get to wear to CHURCH (black church ya’ll) and the black momma was going along with her like “well…..yeah, that looks nice……yeah, it’s nice….” , but when they got home and the two families were together the black momma (to be referred to as B.M. her on out) started talking about the white momma’s choice of garb. O.K., first of all, bitch (B.M.) you KNOW ain’t but a DAYUM few black folks wearing Dashiki’s anymore. You shouldn’t haven’t even gone along with that shit if it wasn’t sincere. So, I agree with the White Momma (W.M.) in that she was a bit irritated because the B.M. let her buy it knowing it wasn’t the thing to wear. But here’s the question: Why (W.M.) is it your belief that all black people wear Dashiki’s??? Are you really that in the dark about black people?? Do you now see black people on t.v. (if no where else) in anything BUT a fuckin Dashiki?????

O.K., so they go to church and the White Daddy (W.D.) is just having him self a HELLUVA BALL at it. He’s clapping and smiling and swaying and going on……he’s standing there looking like the fucking cat that ate the canary! Then he comes out his mouth and says “ It’s like a show that they are putting on…..this is fun….” Or something of the like:


**crickets**

WHAT THE FUCK????A SHOW? I was so appalled at his obvious disrespect of the black church and the goings on of a black church! Muthafucka you think that getting the holy ghost is a SHOW?? He is taking NO steps to understand black people. This is just a free pass in my opinion to walk up to another black and go "whus up my NIGGA!" and not get the shit slapped outta him. He shall take NOTHING from this experience.....I can see it. You think that the hymns that are sang are a SHOW? You think that any of this done in the name of the Lord is a SHOW???? I wanted to jump through the gat-damn t.v. a slap the hog-shit outta him!!! He disgusts me! Instead of appreciating the DIFFERENCES of the church that you go to and this black church and trying to UNDERSTAND it, you degrade it and dismiss with as much irreverence as if you’da spit in somebody’s face! He doesn’t want to LEARN anything from being made up to be black! This is just his chance to run the fuck around in black face and “play”. This is like a free pass into a previously restricted world. See the difference is, we (blacks ) already LIVE IN your world (white world that is) and so the only thing that I can see will be gained by the black folks made to be white, will be that they might become privy to more racist talk or actions than they would if they were walking around as a black person. We ALREADY see what it’s like to be white because it is flaunted in our face. Better opportunities, better wages, less discrimination based on external factors (i.e. if a black with a criminal record and a white with a criminal record of the SAME offense went to apply for a job, WHO do ya think would get the job?????yeah….that’s what I said….). And I think that the black family sees that they ain’t gon get much outta this experience too. The one person who I think will learn the most is the White Girl who is made up to be black (W.G.) She was so bothered that she was in “black face” and that the other people in her group didn’t know her “real deal”.

O.K., but why at the beginning of the the show, the W.M. called her self joking around and said “Hey ……BITCH” to the B.M.????????????????????????????

WHAT.
DA.
FUCK !!


See…that’s why I am NOT on that damn show. I’d snatched her ass outta her clothes so hard and fast and beat her like she stole something that it wouldn’t; EVEN be funny! The W.M. called herself “being socially acceptable”. THIS BITCH REEEEEEEALLY thought that with black women calling each other a bitch was a socially acceptable thing! Oh my God * SMDH * Are you kidding me?? But I guess the proliferation of blacks that call each other bitches and nigga’s in hip-hop and in movies have given white folk just the pass that they need in a situation like THIS to say some shit like that * SMMH* (shaking my mufuckin head).

OOOH……. I could go on but I’m tired of thinking about this stupid show (which I will continue to watch just because it’s addictive if for no other reason than to see what happens) But for those that did see it, what’d you think????

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

MEME Tuesday

Before I get to today's MEME...... thanks Zeddy! I wanted to tell you guys that I have begun to write my son letters. I meant to begin them long ago and now I have looked up and almost 2 years have flown by since he was born. I think I'm gonna try to write one a week or whenever I'm inspired. I really want him to be able to look back on these when he is grown (hopefully before)and appreciate them. I also feel that it will help him to know what his Mommy was like "back then" because I am sure 20 years from now I'll be different than I am now. I will share with him my feelings, my thoughts and my fears....or whatever else comes to mind. Though he probably WON'T appreciate these peeks into my world which when he initially reads them if he's young when he initially reads them, since it will be a time capsule, I am still writing them. I sooo wish I had something penned by my Mom (though she's still alive) or my grandparents written AT THE TIME that they were my age, when I was small, that detailed daily trials and tribulations or just what they ate for lunch and who they talked to.

I want him and his family to one day look back on these when I am long and gone and UNDERSTAND their Mom, grandma and great grandma so that I can live on and leave a small legacy for my family. I think this will be cool.....

Anyway..on to today's MEME.....



Accent – a cross between big city chic and suburban articulate ghetto (not really, but it sounded creative,no?)
Bra size – before or AFTER the breast reduction (shut up Zed ……)
Chore I hate – cleaning……bathrooms and kitchens (interesting that they are my favorite rooms of the house, yet I HAAAATE cleaning those mugs!!!!
Dad's name –(shocker here)….Robert
Essential make-up – eye brown pencil and concealer
Favorite perfume – got a couple actually….Bi (D&G), Bvlgari Blue (Bvlgari)
Gold or Silver? – a combo….white gold or silver
Hometown - Detroit, Michigan
Insomnia – not most times…only when I’m EXTREMELY pissed off
Job Title – Corporate Bullshit Problem Solver (aka. HR Manager)
Kids – yes, my beautiful 21 month old Dylan
Living Arrangement – lots of stuff and my family
Mom's Birthplace - Alabama
Number of Sexual Partners – I’ll never teeeell.
Overnight Hospital Stays – 3 (breast reduction surgery, when I contracted Mononucleosis, and when I had my son
Phobia(s) – Heights, death, bees
Quote – The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference -???
Religion – yes, I have it.
Siblings - 1 brother, 1 sister (I am the baby)
Two I'm tagging – hmm……I’ll pick….Chubby & Freaky Deaky
Unnatural hair colors I've worn – Uh….not many, reddish brown and brownish blondish-somethingish……..but uh, I’ve worn some unnatural hair….. LOL.
Vegetable I refuse to eat – Brussel Sprouts, beets
Worst habit - Cussing Nah…FUCK that…… yeah it’s cussing…. With Road Rage a close second
X-rays I've had – Foot, chest, teeth.
Yummy foods I make – hmm…. That would be much easier to answer if I liked to cook….LOL
Zodiac sign – Virgo baby!

Monday, March 13, 2006

Hey ya'll !

Hey ya’ll !! I know that I have been away for a couple weeks, but the lazy/can’t figure out what to post/too tired to post bug had gotten my ass! But I am back!

So, for all ya’ll that havec been wondering…….here’s a kinda-sorta update on the Wobbles si-chi-a-shun………

Something. There is just something that irks me about Wobbles. I can’t put my finger on it, but I’ve boiled it down to the fact that we just don’t have ANY, ZIP, ZERO chemistry. She reminds me of one of those girls who are stuck in the 80’s with the slightly boofy-poofy dirty blond (though hers is natural) hair. She’s simple in demeanor and not savvy in any sense of the word. She is a reallllly nice person, but boring. I can just tell!!! She wears clothing that looks like someone in Montana who works as a ranchhand would be wearing. She does NOTHING to her mid-back length hair. It is ALWAYS all over the place and she just flat out need some new glasses to detract from that She seems like she just floats through life singing “la lee la laa laa” (probably because 1. she’s a new employee and 2. just because she seems to be na├»ve and “dumb” to office politics and slow to pick up on attitudes, and personalities…..just plain non-observant I guess is a good way to describe it) . But I really think that it stems from her close knit (admittedly strict and sheltered) Mexican parents. She has said that she has a zillion cousins, and that she primarily stayed on her side of town and played with them. I mean, she didn’t even really know how to get to the building we work in! helloooooooooooooooooooo!!!! The building we work in is THEE most recognizable building in Detroit, and the tallest downtown! Come on dawg! It always amazes me when people are so sheltered that they have NO knowledge of VERY common landmarks in a city that they’ve lived in ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL their lives. Anywho, though she’s nice, I just don’t feel a chemistry with her. (which I KNOW my boss is happy about) But I can’t deal with people who are kinda “socially slow”. Now that may sound bad, but if you are one of those people who doesn’t get jokes, has been sheltered and can’t hang with a quick witted person…..chances are, me and you will not be tight. Call it wrong, but that’s just me.

Anyway, on to the post that I have been promising “T” and “Roni”. Roni, you know who you are!! HA HA!!!!

Anyway, Roni invited me to an event that is held every month at a different one of her girlfriends homes every month. Well, this month was at LiLi’s house. LiLi has a bea-u-timous home and since it was Roni’s birthday, I had to oblige, plus I don’t get a chance to get out the dang house without the little one that often and just hang with the girls, so I jumped at the chance! Well, lemme start off by saying LiLi, YO ASS KNOW YOU LIVE FAR AS hell lives from the north pole, right?????

Nevertheless, once I got there it was all good. Everyone brought food (well… I brought somoe dinner rolls, which my ass PROMTPLY forgot about and left in the car in my haste to have a ball!) and the food was delicious! There was pasta salad, wings(honey barbeque and regular), fruit, some type of chicken bake, and cake and of COURSE there were some DRANKS !!!

Now, Roni had said to me “ Pleeze come hang out if you don’t mind hanging around a bunch of 26 year olds”

***SLAP***

Can I just tell ya’ll that though that statement was so innocuous coming out of Roni’s mouth, it hit me like Bobby And Whitney hit the pipe! GATDAMN, I AM NEARLY TEN years older than ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL THESE folks!

(thinking to self ) “ oooh lawd…..lemme sit down that thought made me weezy……naw freak that, I am as young and vibrant as I was when I WAS 26, probably even more so!!! Hhmmph!” So once I got to the gig it was all about the fun ya’ll, and can I just tell you that this group of ladies is HIL-FUCKING-LARIOUS!!!

Some of the stories that were told that night just cracked me the HELL up! I shall definitely be hanging with them again! They are awesome.

I have decided that I am not going to tell the “greatest story ever told” which is a story from “T”s father….I just simplyty can’t do it justice! The story is about how Jewish people indoctrinate their newborns into the evil of the world….. trust me….it’s hilarious!

So….. I am going to make her a blog so she can tell this story!

Interesting but meaningless tidbits:

Why is it that the muthafucka that I work with who is a representative of the HR dept. sooooooooooooooooo intolerant of gay people. I have heard him on SEVERAL occasions making snide –assed comments regarding gays. I am absolutely appauled by him. He was over in his cube (which is DIRECTLY next to mine) making a shitty comment about the movie “Brokeback Mountain”. As he’s talking to someone in the office, he goes “Yeah….good ole Brokeback Mountain……now THERE’s a real American movie! Yeah, THAT shoulda really won some awards” . Now you may say that that is not that bad, but he has said other things such as “I can’t stand the whole gay movement…..it’s disgusting……. “. I know that if I were to say something to him, he and I would be in a HEATED argument over this and I swear it would make me really wanna slap the holy-horse-shit outta his ass. So, I just let him go on his IGNORANT ass diatribe and basically plug my ears.

Can I tell ya’ll just how much I need a vacation??? I wake up EVERYDAY with a lackluster feeling about going to work. Maybe I just need to have a “summer vacation” break like when I was a child. I really need a vacation or a get-away. Though it’s hard for me to figure out how I can do this AND make some money! And can ANYONE tell me why the asshole (the one I spoke of directly above) paces the fucking floor alllllllllll day! He walks past my desk to get to the rest of the office and EVERYTIME he passes he looks at my computer. So, alllllllllllll day long I have to keep switching my screen to a “word documnent” or my fuckin’ e-mail cause HIS dry-crusty-ass is alllllllllllways looking to see what he can see! I can’t STAND his stankin white ass! I bet if I were white, his ass wouldn’t be all over my computer! That’s why I swear, I have my computer’s “font size” on the “very small” size! But the thing is, even though it’s small, you can still tell I’m “surfing” if you even glance at my screen cause no work I do is as colorful as blog pages! LOL *serious look** fuck him.

Well, I am writing this between working, so I had betta go and get back to doing the dang thang!

So in the meantime, ya’ll be good