Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Slap your irritating co-worker day!

Hey ya’ll this is an oldie but goodie. I meant to post about my baby and his potty adventures, but I'll wait until tommorrow for that :)

Anyway, here's an oldie but goodie for you guys to laugh at!

Tomorrow is the official “Slap Your Irritating Co-Worker “ Holiday: Do you have a co-worker who talks nonstop about nothing, working your last nerve with tedious and boring details that you don’t give a rat’s ass about? (yup….my dumb-ass boss is constantly telling me and others who gives a damn LESS about her aging momma, her dead dog, her new house, her buying a bedspread, her siblings all of whom have MULTIPLE things physically wrong with them, etc……O.K. CHECK!) Do you have a co-worker who ALLLLWAYS fucks something up , thereby creating MORE work for your ass ( my boss creates DUMB ass spreadsheets for everything…sometimes redundant mind you and then will wanna change something in it and FUCK UP formulas and SWEAR she gave it to YOU correct and that YOU fucked it up……O.K., CHECK!)??? Do you have a co-worker who kisses so much ass; you can look in their mouth and see what their BOSS ate for lunch (I swear, if I had a dime for every time I saw my boss smiling her shit-eatin grin at the president ….i’d be a rich ass**smdh**…O.K. , CHECK!)? Do you have a co-worker who is SOOOOO obnoxious, when he/she enters a room, everyone else clears it (I swear, if there is a social event, which are few and far between these days because of the saving initiative that’s been going on for the last 2 years, but when there IS a potluck or something, when THAT hoe starts talking and you aren’t OBLIGATED to stay people fake it like they need to go say hi to bobby jo in the corner over there……people get away from this bitch as quickly as possible…..for real ya’ll……..O.K. CHECK!?) Well, on behalf of Ike Turner, I am so very proud and extremely happy to announce tomorrow as


There are some rules you must follow:
• you can only slap one person per hour
• you can slap the same person again if they irritate you again in the asme day.
• You are allowed to hold someone down as other co-worker’s take turns slapping the irritant.
• No weapons allowed… other than going upside somebody’s head with a stapler, hole puncher or if you must (to get your point across) the paper slicer. Just hit em….don’t slice em.
• If questioned by a supervisor (or the police if the supervisor is the irritant), you are allowed to LIE, LIE, LIE !!!!

Now, study the rules, break out your list of folks that could benefit from this intervention that you wanna slap the hog-shit out of and get to slappin’…… and have a great day!


Freaky Deaky said...

Why limit the slapping to just co-workers. The public definitely needs to be let in on the getting slapped part.
If you have more than one job does the slapping one person per hour rule still apply? I'm going to make sure my slapping hand is nice and ashy for tomorrow.

Luke Cage said...

Dagnabit Robyn. A brotha is cocked, Locked and ready to rock. As a matter fact, here come one of those fools now... Ssssss-Laaap!!!
That was "Cold-blooooded!!!"

Knockout Zed said...

I'm the irritating, droning boss! Just try to slap me!!!


stilldaydreaming said...

Man this was funny, I can think of a couple of people that really need this "intervention", there are a couple that I need to slice too LMAO

Thanks for coming by my site :-)

stilldaydreaming said...

Your son is isoo cute, I can't wait to read about his potty adventures. My son is 9 mos and we'll have to tackle the whole potty training thing one day..LOL

SistaGirl said...

I'm on a diff computer and just noticed my comments are coming up as stilldaydreaming oops..sorry :-)

KHALLI 88 said...

I propose we make this a week event 8 hr work day not enough time to slap all these damn workers here on campus!

Serial_Dater said...

I think I used up my alotment of slaps on one person. :o(

Can I trade somebody a chocolate milk for two of your slaps. Thanx.


nikki said...

hahahaha@serial. boy, u off da chain.

diva, we ALL got co-workers like the ones you've described. sometimes it's all of those characteristics rolled into one shitty supervisor (sounds kinda like your boss LOL)

i really want to slap my co-workers, but i gotta use someone else's hands. i ain't getting blisters from doing this ish.

Msnhim said...

too funny!

Mr.Slish said...

Can I hire you to slap a co worker of mine. All expense paid trip to NYC just to slap her silly. There's a bonus in it for ya if you make her top lip bleed..lol

Robyn said...

@slish: meet me at LGA...... I'm on the NEXT PLANE to you! It would be my PLE-ZAH (pleasure) LMAO!!!

@ Nikki: girl.....YES, that is that woman ALLLL rolled into one ball of crap!

@Serial: Boy you KNOW you are funny! I was dying at that and yeah, I'll trade you two chico sticks if you'll slap her for me on Monday!

@Sista: Girrrl..... this lil boy always amazes me and yes, the potty adventures are JUST beginning, I knoooow we got a lonnnng way to go! And thanks for tbe compliments on my sweetie pie :-)

@Khalli: here here! I AGREE 195%!

JoJo D. said...

Hell, yeah. I'd slap the shit out that bitch. I'd make it a pimp slap at that...

spchrist said...

If I slapped someone...I would be drawing blood and then they would have all the evidence to look me up.