Friday, October 27, 2006

S.I.L. 3, 4 , 5 & 6 rolled into one long ass post!

Hey ya’ll,

This has been lonnnnnnng in coming and consequently this is verry, verrrrrry, verrrrrrrrry long. A few of ya’ll { Diva, Zed & TS ) have read this, so ya’ll can just feel free to comment as there is no new stuff from what ya’ll have read already other than my comments sprinkled throughout.
I’m telling ya’ll , it’s long…..take a nap in between reading if you need to…..
This takes off where S.I.L. 2 left off.......

And yes, I know I have been MUUUUCH nicer than many people would have been...... read on........


Subject: RE: Party
Date: Thu, 19 Oct 2006 09:04:59 -0400

Well, Ann-

I totally understand that you feel like this was an unfair “takeover” of your party since people knew that you wanted to have a party for his 40th. One thing I can say is that because it was his 40th, he was probably EXPECTING something anyway (at least a LITTLE something), so he might not have been THAT surprised. I mean, heck, I would DEFINITELY be EXPECTING **my hubby** to do something for my 40th, so there COULD be no surprise for me. I will be sitting on pins and needles and like a kid at Christmas WAITING on my “something”. So, I am not saying you had a bad idea, I am just saying that another way to look at it is, that he might have been expecting something. I’m trying to be nice……….

With that said, NOW we have the opportunity to do something SMALLER that really WILL be a surprise because he won’t be expecting anything more than Vegas at this point (if we go to Vegas). Don’t give up that easily…. I know you really want something personal and special from you and we can STILL have something personal and small (like surprising him with PEOPLE rather than an actual party----that won’t cost you anything-----). Or YOU can have a surprise-romantic night on the town with him in Vegas and **their son** can stay with us…..

And I can TOTALLY see that (my b.i.l.) probably never “desired” to go to L.V., but if he genuinely seems to like the idea, if you don’t want to talk to Jane about it and change the plans, he will probably still have a memorable 40th. Otherwise, talk to Jane and get it straightened out. Otherwise you are going to be PISSED OFF TO THE HIGHEST from NOW on until, and DURING THE TRIP……. And that simply isn’t good for your fun-factor or your blood pressure. If you are really that opposed to it, I say that you talk it over some more with Jane. Really…….I think that she would listen to alternatives………..but don’t just be pissed and say “f’ it…..” because you are mad. You need to be able to enjoy yourself in this whole scenario too.

Your point is well taken that you are pissed off because this was not discussed with you….. I give you all the validation in the world for feeling like that. Because after all, this is your husband. But this is sooooooooo early in the planning stages that stuff CAN be changed and Vegas just worked for everybody because it’s an idea that people like. But Ann, it’s JUST an idea……. And though (my b.i.l.) knows about it, we can come up with ANOTHER idea that DOES NOT involve him knowing so that you are not so extremely unhappy and angry about the celebration. I would HATE for you to be so upset in Vegas and just not having a good time.

I hope I can just help you to look on a BRIGHTER side of things and I think Vegas is a wonderful idea, but there are PLENTY of wonderful ideas. This is a whole year away that is plenty of time to figure something out. Just give it some thought…..ruminate on it…….and once you are a bit less upset ……. My biggest thing is


(to at least let her know that YOU are not feeling that for your husband and that he’s just kinda “going with the flow” about the idea, but not all gung ho like everybody else and it IS his birthday…….did I get the feeling he has correct? Because if that’s the way he feels, SHE needs to know about it, because SHE thinks he’s rarin’ and ready to go!)

Just thoughts to hopefully add some perspective.



From: Ann []
Sent: Thursday, October 19, 2006 5:21 PM
To: Robyn (00900)
Subject: RE: Party

Yes, this was an unfair takeover. I already had the private room set for that date with our own private buffet and cash bar. I already know that (my b.i.l.) would have been expecting something, but he wouldn't have expected his childhood friend from cancun who he has not seen in 11 years or another friend he hasn't seen from another part of the U.S. He also would not have expected the slideshow of pictures of him and his family. Or the scrapbook. and all the other personal touches I had planned.
Which by the way he said he would have enjoyed a D & B party very much (you can let **my hubby** know). It was not going to be the least bit "informal" or impersonal. Yes I know it is a year away, but with what I had in mind I knew I needed the time to plan and save (was this bitch even going to do ANY saving…..yeah O.K…..I doubt it since she was ACTIVELY seeking “sponsors”…..). Just so everybody is clear.
Like I said, I have nothing against going to Las Vegas or any other suggestions but nobody has bothered to call the wife and clue her in or ask her opinion, while she is over here planning a party that everybody already agreed upon. With that said, The party is canceled and I've canceled the private room.
So if everybody else wants to go to Las Vegas or wherever than that is fine. As long as my husband is okay with it. I'm sure it'll be fun. As far as I'm concerned, Jane can plan for his birthday in Vegas and I will be fine with it.

Subject: RE: Party
Date: Fri, 20 Oct 2006 09:52:44 -0400

Yes, I understand…

I just don’t want YOU to be unhappy, and I just have the feeling that you will be IN Vegas and be PISSED about this whole thing STILL and it’s a year away. And just for clarification, when I said it was a year away, I just meant that to say that we have time to plan something if you want to, not in a “why the heck are you doing this so early” way.
And in all fairness, you hadn’t talked to Jane yet (she was the one who came up with the LV idea) and she was the one who really got the ball rolling. I am not saying that to “point fingers” , just as a statement of fact. Now of the other people who knew (me, **my hubby** , anyone else you’d discussed this with), planned the LV thing……. Know what I mean? Jane came up with the idea because she thought he might like it. She (admittedly) should have called you and discussed it with you very soon after the plan was brought up in all fairness.

And it’s not that LV works BETTER for us, it works just AS well, because we were having to probably (unless we can both get the time off) spend @$900.00 anyway to fly, and even if we drove, gas costs (there and back) @$400. This wasn’t something that works BETTER for us specifically. I just think that you and Jane need to talk and it seems that you two have not talked together to decide/figure out if you all want to make the plan LV (because it doesn’t matter to me…. We will be wherever the celebration is regardless).

You two need to talk. Because you are very angry and I can see 1 of two things happening: 1. you stay angry and your blood pressure stays high and you’ll STILL be angry at the celebration or 2. you talk to HER about what happened, tell her you are a bit frustrated because you DID have something planned and the fact that she told **my b.i.l.** and didn’t even talk with you wasn’t fair to you because you were planning something.

I think you should do #2…….but that’s just my opinion.

Again, you have my support and I just don’t want you to be all pissed off when this can be solved sooner rather than letting this fester and no one is talking to each other.


From: Ann []
Sent: Friday, October 20, 2006 4:41 PM
To: Robyn (00900)
Subject: RE: Party

Let's get one thing straight (and I am saying this nicely) I don't have blood pressure issues, so don't work about that. My blood pressure is equipped to handle my hot temper.
Next, I had talked to Jane about planning a party. I just hadn't given her all the details about the dave an d busters thing. We talked about doing it at her pool then a couple weeks ago I decided that he would enjoy having it at D & B and just hadn't told her yet. Therefore I am the one who got the ball rolling on a birthday celebration. She just got it rolling on Vegas. There's the correct statement of fact! First I told her we would try for this year and later I told her that next year would be better. Julius told me that she said she didn't understand that I meant next year.
But don't worry I wont be pissed off and unhappy in Vegas. Again, Like I said, I'm sure it will be fun and I never had a problem with Vegas, but Hell ,she even discussed it with you ( or **my hubby**) or however you found out. I'm not sure. And she still has yet to call me. HIS WIFE!!!
How would you feel if you were planning something for your man which you told her and you found out she was thinking of something else and told every one else before you? You would be pissed to. So when she calls , we will talk about it. By the way. what is she saying since it seems you two are communicating?
{I was soooooooooo angry when I got this that I started to call her and cuss her out. I actually got so mad I got a headache and had to walk away. I don’t know WHO THE FUCK she thinks she is talking to! Her DAMN CHILD?????????? I LITERALLY had to take a step back but after I sent what you are about to read below, I am done. The kid gloves are OFF and I was READY to cuss her out. FUCK HER! Why should I be nice to THIS BITCH when she’s OBVIOUSLY lost a fucking screw and thinks she can talk to other GROWN people anyway she wants to!! You see….., I was tryyyying to be nice in the interest of “I have to see this hoe at family functions, so I will take the high road and not CUSS HER THE FUCK OUT” but after THIS e-mail….. I have RESOLVED myself to the fact that me and her funky ass MIGHT JUST have an adversarial relationship and at THIS point, I am FINE with it! Sooooo….. read below for the conclusion…..” }

Subject: RE: Party
Date: Sat, 21 Oct 2006 20:24:24 -0400

I actually only talked to her that one time when she suggested LV....we haven't talked since then. I agree WHOLE.HEARTEDLY that I would not be happy at ALL if I was circumvented in the process ESPECIALLY if I was the one who started the process. So, I agree. Also, I was only referencing blood pressure in terms of the sheer fact that ANYONE's blood pressure becomes elevated when they are angry and therefore I am SURE if you had taken a reading of YOURS when you are angry, I am SURE it's more elevated than usual. That's all.

I simply feel that you and Jane need to talk (some more than you did initially) and if SHE isn't going to call you, that AS his WIFE, you need to be the one to go ahead and suck it up and call her so this can get out in the open so that EVERYBODY is on the same page. But again, that is your decision, so from this point I will gracefully bow out of it....... because I do not want to be caught in the middle of something that I was only trying to help fix as best i can.

So, if you are really O.K. with it, I guess there's nothing else to say but "Let's go and have fun in Vegas! "
{First of all, I sent this to this bitch on Saturday the 20th and she didn’t respond to me until Wednesday the 25th…..yeah…… and notice how she done checked and CALCULATED MY financial involvement, HA! She is fucking CRAZY!!!}

From: Ann []
Sent: Wednesday, October 25, 2006 12:26 PM
To: Robyn (00900)
Subject: RE: Party

{ Now her ass is all calm and cordial…….whatever how, you have awoken the DEMON in me….. she will NEVER get the “nicey-nice” Robyn-a-fucking-gain!!!And I mean that. }
Hey Girl,
I just want to say thank you for trying to help and for you advice. I really do appreciate it. **b.i.l.** and I talked about this Las Vegas thing the other night and we have decided not to go for these reasons.
1)He doesn’t really want to. He says Las Vegas is just not his thing if we are going to go out of town he's rather go some place where he would really enjoy himself with things he likes to do. It is his birthday. He's not a drinker a gambler or a club goer. The only thing he would enjoy is going to Andre Agassi's tennis academy { My b.i.l. is BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG into Tennis and plays CONSTANTLY}and maybe seeing a show (his words) which for the 3 of us to see would cost the same as a plane ticket. ( I checked) We can't afford that right now.
2) It's to expensive for us right now. I priced plane tickets for us and for you. You may be able to get them cheaper, I don't know but, from what I priced, it's cheaper for you to fly to Atlanta according to cheaptickets .com. { WHY IS THIS HOE CHECKING MY SHIT?????} Then once we get to Las Vegas we still have to pay for a hotel( $$$). Then we have to pay for at least 3 meals a day for 3 people. Then we have to pay more money if we catch a show ($$$ 1 plane ticket price for 2-3 people, according to my sister who has been there many times.) You know we are going to want to do some slot machines and go shopping some. ($$$) **b.i.l.** says that we just don't have the money right now spend on all that especially since it's not something he really wants to do anyway. He said we would have been better off sticking with the D&B plan. He would have enjoyed that much better anyway. Just scaled down so it wouldn't cost so much.
You said going to LV works better financially for you. I personally think you would have been better off financially coming to Atlanta because A-the plane ticket is cheaper. B- You don't have to pay for a hotel C- you don't have to buy 3 meals a day for 3 people unless you just want to go out to eat. I would have provided food for you. D- **my b.i.l.** would actually get to see more friends and family because they all wouldn't have to figure out how to pay for all that stuff listed above in LV. Now, I understand and have no hurt feelings that you can't spare a couple hundred dollars to help me give **b.i.l.** a 40th bash. But in my opinion you would end up spending a lot more on JUST the hotel, unless you all have connections we don't know about( not counting food and shopping and a show and whatever else you know we can & will came up with to spend money on) then you would have if you spared a little to help me with the party. {Can ya’ll BELIEVE she slipped THAT shit in there????? I didn’t even acknowledge it in my return email below….. whatever how… are laughable at this point and I am not the one} But that's just my opinion. I apologize for putting you in an awkward position and soliciting your help. I don't want to cause money drama here so let's forget I asked and I am currently coming up with something else.
So if you all want to still go to Las Vegas, By all means go and I hope you have a wonderful time. Maybe we can plan a girls trip there one day {Is she SERIOUS???? PUH-LEASE!!!! You could NOT PAY ME to go anywhere with her dumb azz!!!LMAO}because LV is someplace I have always wanted to go to but I knew it just was not someplace **my b.i.l.** wants to go. (He told me so). So I don't think it's the right birthday for him. Now for mine or your birthday, that's a no brainer!( when is your birthday by the way?)
So I am currenty working on plan B for **my b.i.l.**'s birthday and when I have everything finalized, I will let everyone know. So If you didn't hear about it from me, than it's not part of the plan.


P.S. I will be calling Jane in a few minutes.

She had my b.i.l. call his momma and (to be nice) told her that well….we can’t go because we doin’t have any money, blah, blah, blah…… So when my husband talked to his mom she goes “O.K….that’s cool, I understand….. but if I sell this house then we can still go and nobody will have to pay”. LOL She COMPLETELY didn’t get the memo that there are TWO factors to not going #1, they don’t have the $$, and #2 THEY DON”T WANT TO GO!!!! I was LMBAO when my husband told me that because apparently Jane is DEAD SET on going to Vegas! And hell nor high water are apparently going to stop her! LOL So, I am suuuuuuuuuuure there will be an epi-epi-logue to this because if she sells that house, she gon be like “o.k., so now what….. pack ya bags”. And they (my bi.l. and s.i.l.) did themselves a HUGE disservice by not telling her that they do NOT really want to go!

Enjoy ya’ll’s weekend….. ya’ll should be sleepy since I have given you a nice LONG read before beddy-by.



Knockout Zed said...


I quote Brother Minister Malcolm X, "In-laws are outlaws". At least IMHO.


Robyn said...

And THAT is why I love you Zed! LOL

chele said...

You are soooooo civilized. And you were much nicer to that heffa than you should've been ... I understand why but I woulda checked that chick after the first e-mail. If she wasn't such a dumb azz (asking folks to pay for her man's party) than none of this would have jumped off. I mean, she made such a stink about the fact that Jane took over the party planning and how she's his WIFE ... blah blah blah ...well, honey if you're his wife than step up to the plate and plan (and pay for) his party. Otherwise, take his ass out to dinner and do him in the back of a limo!

Robyn said...

@Chele: THANK YOU! And I am no longer civilized. I am like this: I will take a whollllllllllle lot and once you break that camel's back..... the shit is forever and irreperably broken. It has been broken. She is a dingbat and I am stillllllll so amazed that she thinks I would go someplace WITH her! And I love my B.I.L. to death because he REALLY is a verrryr nice guy, but how he got HER ass is BEYOND me...... **sigh**

Aziza said...

Robyn: You've shown yourself to be a nice person. It amazing to see how your sister-in-law failed to understand that it's inconsiderate and selfish of her to plan a party which depends on "somebody else's money."

Luke Cage said...

Hey miss Robyn. What a read luv! Well, I will say that I think you should've ended that whole thing after her first e-mail. One reply to you, and straighten her out and that would've been the end of it. Plus sometimes, you expend so much energy trying to reach someone that its not worth the effort. kudo's to you and your patience though. I laughed at all of your red markings. They helped move the e-mails along. Have a great weekend lady!

Tired of being broke said...

Robyn can I get some of the patience you have. That B**** had it coming a few posts back. Please I would have read her a** the riot act a long time ago. Ask my brother's girlfriend about me(but then again I do not talk to the B**** no mores anyway). She had lost her mind and stepped to me wrong, so I had to cut her at the knees.

The Goddess said...

All I can say is that you s.i.l proves to be a trip, to say the least. You deserve an award for your patience. lol Hope you have a great weekend.

sherri said...


You are much nicer than you come off in the comments. Your sil comes off manipulative.... and you would be right to distance yourself completely from her silly behind and wait to be told what the plans were.

I can't believe that people have the nerve to suggest that YOU chip in for their gift/party. My BIL did that to me this year for my husbands 40th gift. He thought he would get him XX if I wanted to chip in. Sorry, I've already purchased my gift. Crazy inlaws.

The_Hustleman AKA James W. Dennis said...

Hey Mz Robyn, seems things will be what they will be. A litle disappointed on the Vegas thing, but I'm lovin' Jane! I mean she's so focused it's ridulous! I feel for your s.i.l because that's going to be a real battle for her. I'm smirkin' just thinking about it. I love it when people have to deal with the results of their actions, correction... misguided actions. I know there will be updates, and I'll be back when they come. Much love.