Wednesday, August 09, 2006

If you hear any noise it's just me & da boys.....

In a world of fly by night romances, haughty broads, too cool nigga’s , fake hoes, sneaky bitches and backstabbers, there is nothing like the little seen entity….. True Friends. In specific, I am focusing on my true MALE friends.

You see, I have always been a person who had more MALE friends than female friends , mainly because bitches are crazy,sneaky and WAAAAAAAAAY better at mosquito-esque techniques (meaning, before you even know that most of them are stabbing your ass, they have gotten in, gotten on and are about to leave the scene of the crime). Now, I was always verrrrrrrrry scared of rejection, so even if there WERE dudes I liked, I always became the “:friend”. That’s the “safe” box I put myself in to stop myself from being hurt or turned down. It’s interesting that some of them later told me that they had a thing for me! WTF??? DAMMIT!! **shrug**

I have had many “frociates” (see The Kajuana Show circa 2005), that would be a friend + accociate who you have never had “biblical dealing “ with. I mean, I would literally just come INTO knowing a zillion guys. But these 3 guys, these 3 negroes have proven themselves in my life to be “BEST FRIENDS” in the truest sense of the word. This is my tribute to them.


Don't we just look gay and HAPPY as Hell????? Heck we were young......we had a right to be!!.....this pic is OVER 10 years old!!!!LOL

Me & the Zedster met at Michigan State University sometime in the year of 1989 (I think…correct me Zed if I am wrong….). I think that it was at some point that I would see him CONSTANTLY around the campus and we’d stop and talk and chit chat about bullshit, etc. It wasn’t until after he came back to MSU after a brief stint at the crib (ahem,…..) that we got tight. I will never forget this conversation that was had at my then, campus apartment. Here’s how it went:

Zed: So….. you dating anybody?? **cheese**
Me: Yes…. I am
Zed: Who? Do I know him?
Me: I dunno….. I am dating this guy named Dave.
Zed: Dave who?
***I go into my room to grab the picture of Dave that was on my desk***
Me: Dave Harris
***Zed looks at picture and almost swallows his tongue***
Zed: DAVE! DAVE??? You mean Minority Aide DAVE???
Me: ***laughing and smiling*** Yes, THAT Dave.
Zed: SHIT !!

And so continued our platonic friendship LOL. It was soooo funny to see the look on his face when he discovered that it was the Dave he KNEW , and not only KNEW but who he was REAL COOL with! Our friendship kinda waxed and waned and I graduated and moved to D.C., so we lost touch for a minute. It wasn’t until I came back to Detroit that me & Zed connected again and it was on from then. I mean, me & Zed would hang out at LEAST once every two weeks and we would talk pretty much EVERY DAY! It was great to have a friend who I’d known for such a long time be back in effect and in my life. Zed has seen me through the Dave-breakup saga and through job issues and through me getting to know myself as a woman. He is one of THEE best counselors and advisors I know and he and I are SO much alike that it’s really not even funny. He used to ALWAYS refer to me as the “male version” of him (so that tells ya’ll I have mannnnnnnnny untold stories…… hee hee). And indeed, we are a lot alike. There are times where we’ll be talking and I will say “Uh…..umm… well…..” and he will just say “yeah man….. I KNOW what you mean…. I feel what’chu mean”. And hence started the all of the references to “Monkey’s”…. monkey this, monkey that and it just stuck. I love my Zed and I hope he always knows how much I appreciate him!


Ohhh LAWD! What can I say about this negro? I met Earl also at Michigan State and became friends with him. He is 1/3 of the “Monkey Triumverate”, also known as myself, him and our boy Steve. We have also remained tight since college. Now, Earl is the smooth monkey out of the group. He has the “pretty boy/corporate thug” thing going on and knows how to handle himself with the ladies. He was SUCHHHH a playa in college and après college that I am surprised that I became as cool with his butt as I did. But one thing that was true about me and Earl’s relationship, was that once he found that I was his GIRL, true blue, he let down his guard and let me BECOME his friend, his true friend. It also wasn’t until after college that me & Earl became the way we are today. Me , Earl & Steve also share a love of disco (hence my screename ya’ll). Now, Earl is straight up from the “east side” and will tell somebody “lookie here, I’m from da east side,…… I don’t play dat” LOL and please believe it, he will get down if need be. He just hates resorting to stuff like that. But don’t let the pretty face fool you….. he will get wit’chu. So, imagine him, “baby thug life" as I could call him, being ALLLLL IN with some semi-bohemian, deep underground house and disco. HUH? Yeah, that’s what me & Steve said at first. But this brotha was as into this shit as most prepped-out, semi-intellectual, wanna-be folks who like deep house and disco are. Word. Me, Steve and Earl have been on numerous trips outta town together (Chicago, NYC a couple times and Toronto). We allhave said that the chemistry between the three of us is like that of no other three people. It is simply undescribeable and special. Earl now lives in Chicago and Steve, Arizona, so the triumvirate is split amongst 3 different time zones now. But when it was on, it was great. Literally some of the best times of MY LIFE. Earl and I would hang together and just go to grab a bite to eat or we’d just sit up in his crib and have some drinks and chill. I was like a sister to him, so there was never any pretense or put-on with us. Just realness. And I appreciate it. Because I was the “minority” of the triumvirate, I became “one of the guys”. And I am glad I did. These mufuckas would NOT MINCE ANY WORDS around me about women. They talked about “hoes” , “bitches”, “tricks” and any other variation that you can think of. I was being reverse-schooled! And I ate it up. I think that that is why my knowledge of the “game” is above and beyond where it woulda been had I not had these two. I have been to strip clubs and freak clubs. I have been WITH Earl when he was trying to talk to a chic and when the chic was like “who is that?” (referring to me, seated in the FRONT seat) he replied “oh, that’s my ex-wife”….. the chicken’s loved him, and he them. Earl has GOT to be the smoothest when it comes to dealing with women and though I did not always sanction his methods and such, I respected it because it was TEACHING me how shit REALLY is in the mind of a nigga. Indeed, Earl is a ride-or-die kinda mufucka. I have NO doubt that he would do anything for me…..all I have to do is make the call and he’d be on the way. True.


Steve and I met, where else? At Michigan State in 1990. He was a freshman and I was trying to be a junior! Lol. Well, from the FIRST time we met and he told me he was a DJ who loved disco/ house etc. and we sat down and talked, his spirit spoke to mine and I said to myself “ I HAVE to become cool with this dude…..he is MY type of person”. That coupled with the fact that he was a DJ who spun house/disco and I was too excited to be his friend. And I mean that in a TOTALLY platonic way. I just WANTED to talk to him some more because there I was usually feeling like I had the weirdest taste in music as compared to the masses and here he comes and LOVVVVVVES, not just likes, the SAME kinda music I do!!! I HAD TO become his friend! Funny thing is, he has since told me that he felt the SAME way about me upon first talking and meeting me. He and I lived in the same dorm until he moved off campus and I graduated. So, friendship came fast and easy with Steve and I. He was a “preppy kid”, I was a “preppy kid”. He loved house/disco, I loved house/disco. It was natural. I was soo glad to have someone that didn’t misunderstand me and that liked the same things that I liked! When me, him and Earl heard about this TIGHT club in NYC called Club Shelter and went there, me & Steve literally CRIED tears of joy at the entrance to the club because we heard the music and thought "we are NOT the only ones on the planet who LOVES THIS.EXACT.KIND .OF.MUSIC". Me & Steve talk about that often about that being a defining moment in our lives and the fact that we shared it together. Me and him are just "there" when it comes to music and there has been NO ONE to "feel" the music like I do OTHER THAN him. That is special.

Steve and Earl (in background) in Soho...

We have stayed in contact with each other throughout the years and he is really like a brother to me. So much so that I even had a key to his house and vice versa. He would tell women that basically “rob is my girl. that’s it. Nothing more. And if you can’t deal with that then…....get on”. Wow. Yeah, I was the queen **adjusting crown** and closer to him than his (3) sisters in many ways. We have been there through each other’s break ups, loaning money to one another, parental death, heartbreaks, TOOOO many laughs to name and more happy times than I think most people if there was ever a time that I needed someone, he has been my sounding board, critic and uplifter in anyway he can. Even though Steve lives in Arizona now, I still feel as close to him today as when he was here. He just passed the Bar and is embarking on this new journey and I am soo proud (plus I can get free legal advice now! HA!!) All in all I am TRULY blessed to have my boys. They gave me that "other" male perspective that women just CANNOT give you. I hope that people out there have friends , may it be male or female because there are times that you need a shoulder to lean on or someone to share a smile with. These fella's have been there through it all.

I treasure them and hope that they know this !


Luke Cage said...

This is one of the best posts I've read in a minute. I love the exclusivity of close friendships. There's nothing like it. My best friend is a female and the things we know about eachother are unparalleled so I feel a sista on where you are coming from. It seems to me that the opposite sex does make the better of friends than same sex ones. I don't know why that is, but it seems to bear weight. Anyway, nicely done miss Robyn. That's the way to show appreciation!

chele said...

I loved this too. My best friend is also male. Been friends for more than 25 years. I may have to steal this idea for a post ... if anyone is deserving of a tribute it's my boy.

Knockout Zed said...

I deserved this post. I appreciate finally being recognized for my intelligence rather than my body.


Robyn said...

@Luke: Thanks hon and yes, I think that opposite sex makes for better friends as well!

@Chele: Go for it mama!! Do that post!!

@Zed:.... you's a DAYUM fool.... and that's ALL I have to say about that! LOL

Knockout Zed said...

I remember this shit well. Didn't I unsuccessfully try to mack on your ex coworker?

Did Earl ever take off them gold braces? That shit was extree ghetto.


Robyn said...

@KZ: uh...yes, bruh, you did and for the LIFE of me I can't figure out WHY!!! ??? She was NOT that attractive and she really NEEDED (not to be too mean) some Rogaine! AND the kicker was that she was (if you remember) a little touched...... LOL

Miss Ahmad said...

okay i been over here lurking but i had to post something, this is an awesome post. my homeboys have come and gone over the years, very few have made it past the ten year mark, but those who have are very special.

i'm starting to think you're a man hog though girl, you got it all, the husband, the baby, the male friends..

i should definately try being nicer to folks, i hear it helps!

Robyn said...

@MA: HEEEY girl!! **waving**

O.K., I have a confession too... I lurk on your page too!!! LOL And yes, I agree.... I soooo treasure these three guys and love them dearly.

Single Ma said...

Now that's wassup! Friendships that can withstand distance AND time are to be cherished. You got some fine azz friends. I'm sure you have some stories to tell. Umm, please do!

Zed wouldn't mind. He likes the publicity. LOL