Hall Monitor

So, we have the ability to wear jeans to work and most people take advantage of this quite often. There is this woman who is a VP of "something-or-other" and who used to be one of the people if anyone asked about her I would have (notice the past tense) said "Oh, such-and-such? She's reeeally nice". Well no more.

Such-and-such flipped the heck out on me one time last year sometime when I was her designated recruiter. I made a mistake which I ended up fixing with NO consequences in the end and she went BALLISTIC on me over something fixable and to me, then acted "not as friendly" ever since. You have ONE TIME to treat me like THAT and you never will again....cuz I FO'SHO got'cho dayum numba!

So, back to the jeans. One day I was up at the front (which I RARE.LY am) talking to the 2 receptionists (both of whom are black) about something or other. Well, the front desk is a kind of semi-circle and I was directly in front. So Stankalita comes and is like " Oh you know you are NOT supposed to be in FRONT of this desk with jeans on..... "the president" has only allowed us to wear them with the caveat that if you need to ask the receptionist(s) anything, you stand over on the end of the semi circle (thereby hiding your lower half)". So, my response was "are you serious?" because I had NEEEEEEEEVER heard of ANY nonsense like THAT!! She gave me a dry -ass look and was like "yes I am serious..... if "the preseident" came up here and saw you standing here (or anyone else) he would not be happy.... we only are able to wear jeans on anyday with that caveat because we do not want clients to see us in jeans".

I proceeded to have a look of you have got to be FUCKING kidding me!" on my face as I looked her square in her face and she was looking like "yes BITCH I am serious!" I was like "oooo k..... I had never heard that so that is news to me."

That was months ago when the above happened.

So, fast forward...in talking to the receptionists, they always tell me about how she walks around like a flippin 10th's grade hall monitor to see if someone is "wearing jeans at the desk" and will go OFF on her tirade in a DEFINITELY shitty way if she see's someone in violation of code 3957493, section b" a.k.a. the DUMB ASS SHIT section.

****insert blank look and rolled eyes****.

And interestingly enough when her "fellow" VP's or her lil sr. leadership buds come up there with jeans on,ohhhhhhhhhhhh she has nothing to say, but when one of "us" comes up and she CATCHES the person, she reads them teh flippin riot act.

So fast forward to last week. I was at the desk, 2 inches away from the 6-inch wide panel that you are supposed to "hide behind" if you are wearing jeans and supoosedly where clients can't see you and she comes past the glass doors and sees me. This bitch comes in and proceeds to go off saying " You know... you are supposed to be BEHIND the desk when you have on jeans and if this happens again, you are gonna make EVERYONE lose their priveleges, because if the "president" gets word of this he will revoke everybody;s privelege and how would that look.... the HR person got EVERYONE's privelege revoked.....blah, blah, blah". I looked at her and kept talking while she was talkig and said "well me and "the president" have alot of love and we are on good terms ... he wouldn't revoke my privelge...don;t even worry about it" (now, I am BOIL.ING inside because if I had said what I REALLY wanted to say, we'da been in "the president's" office in 5 minutes!! So... instead I just kept talking over her ass). So don't you know this bitch had the nerve to say "Not when I get through with him... hee hee hee".


***record scratching***

I said "EXCUSE ME?????".... "like I said, don;t worry about it, I was BARELY in sight and inches away from the "designated spot".... I am SURE "the president" would NOT be that assanine as to really revoke people's priveledge over that.... so do't you worry about it". What I really wanted to say was WHO THE FUCK DIED and made you "JEANS ENFORCER"?????? I mean, give me a dayum BREAK lady!!! If you wanted children you shoulda BIRTHED them because I am not the one! (she has no kids and is 55'ish...just her and her old ass husband)

I wish this trick WOULD take me to the "principal's" office because I would be like "what kinda of childish, tattle-telling mess is she on???? I am a grown woman and she is absolutely REDICULOUS with this monitoring that she does!" She would see a whooooole other side of me if it ever got to that point AND I would bring up the fact that there have been SEVERAL times where HER ass has not been abiding by her OWN code of conduct! Most recently last week where she stood her behind in between the two receptionists in PLAIN view to ANY client with a basketball jersey and jeans on to talk about some gi-nomous diamond her husband had just bought her . What-the-fuck-ever lady.... let ME catch your ass ..... she betta been lucky I DIDN'T see her!!

But really,why am I even having to write this damn blog??? this is some CHILD.ISH mess! This is why I need a drink or three after leaving this place!

More on that tomorrow..... back to posting more often people!